Life as I know it

ribbu:

there’s a special place in hell reserved just for me

it’s called the throne

(via andrewquo)

thespacegoat:

remember a few years ago when the parody account MorgonFreeman made this post

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and now to this day people still think he said it

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that’s my favorite thing to ever happen on the entire intenet

(via steves-butt)

"Will they give it back to me?"

hotel-job:

GUEST: Do you have somewhere I can store my bag?
CONCIERGE: Absolutely. Across the lobby with the bellmen. They’ll store your bag for you.
GUEST: What do I do?
CONCIERGE: Just give them the bag.
GUEST: Oh. But I’ll need it back. Will they give it back to me?
CONCIERGE: Just make it very clear that it’s not a gift, that you’re just letting them borrow it and it should be ok.